How These Hilarious Quotes Guaranteed to Make Mom Snort-Laugh

Let’s face it, Moms are the superheroes of our lives. They juggle a million tasks, dispense endless love (and tissues!), and somehow manage to keep their sanity (most of the time). But even superheroes need a good laugh now and then.

This list combines funny quotes about motherhood, self-deprecating Mom humor, pop culture references, and some lighthearted jabs at getting older – all guaranteed to put a smile on your Mom’s face (and maybe even elicit a snort-laugh!).

Self-Deprecating Mom Humor (She’ll See Herself In These):

• “I’m not yelling, I’m just mom-splaining at a reasonable volume.” (Unknown)
• “My therapist says I should express my anger in healthy ways. So I’m going to the grocery store. Alone.” (Crystal Paine)
• “On a scale of 1 to 10, how stressed am I? 10. Do you want details?” (Unknown)
• “The only thing harder than being a parent is being a grandparent who has to watch their kids raise their kids.” (Regina Waldroup)
• “Laundry is like the hydra monster. You finish one load and two more appear.” (Rita Rudner)
• “Coffee is like a hug in a mug. Except way hotter and less judgmental.” (Unknown)
• “Wine is the only thing I understand in French.” (Unknown)
• “My memory is like my internet browser. I have 19 tabs open, 3 are frozen, and I can’t remember what I came here to do.” (Unknown)
• “Adulting is yelling ‘Where are my shoes?’ while simultaneously tripping over them.” (Unknown)
• “I may be messy and forgetful, but my house is full of love (and laundry).” (Unknown)

Quotes About Motherhood (A Little Sweetness Goes a Long Way):

• “The most powerful thing in the world is a mother’s love.” (Agatha Christie)
• “Being a mother is learning about strengths you didn’t know you had and dealing with fears you didn’t know existed.” (Linda Wooten)
• “There’s no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one.” (Jill Churchill)
• “A mother is the one who fills your heart with love even before you have words to express it.” (Emilie Griffin)
• “Motherhood: All the love you ever wanted wrapped in a bunch of whining, crying, and dirty laundry.” (Marty Norman)
• “Children are the anchors that hold a mother to life.” (Sophocles)
• “The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” (Theodore Hesburgh)
• “It is not what you do for your children but what you have taught them by the way you have lived that will make them useful members of society.” (Ann Landers)
• “The heart of a mother is a bottomless chasm of love.” (Robert Browning)
• “There is nothing as powerful as a mother’s love for her child.” (Love From Mom)

Pop Culture References and Puns (A Touch of Silliness):

• “Motherhood: Powered by coffee, wine, and inappropriate humor.” (Unknown)
• “I’m not saying I’m a bad mom, but I used my child’s college fund to buy myself a new yoga mat. In my defense, it was on sale.” (Terri Guinn)
• “I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not so sure.” (RuPaul)
• “Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.” (Arlene Dahl)
• “I don’t need therapy. I just need someone to listen to me complain about my kids for an hour.” (Unknown)
• “Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.” (Bad Dad Jokes)
• “What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!” (Dad Jokes)
• “I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.” (Yogi Berra)
• “Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. But in the end, you wish you had a club and a spade.” (Unknown)

• “To err is human, to forgive is divine, to quote Yogi Berra is retrieving the wrong darn sweater.” (Yogi Berra)
• “I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.” (Yogi Berra)
• “Isn’t it funny how birthdays are good for you, but birthday cake isn’t?” (Edwin Arlington Robinson)

Quotes About Aging (A Little Wink, Wink):

• “Getting older isn’t for sissies. But then again, neither is youth.” (Ruth Gordon)
• “I don’t mind getting older. It’s just my birthday that keeps creeping up on me.” (Shirley Bassey)
• “Middle age is when you’re young enough to know what you’re doing and old enough not to care.” (Shirley Bassey)
• “At some point in life, the scales tip and you just stop caring what people think.” (Katherine Hepburn)
• “Today is the oldest you’ve ever been and the youngest you’ll ever be again.” (Eleanor Roosevelt)
• “You don’t stop laughing because you grow old; you grow old because you stop laughing.” (George Bernard Shaw)
• “Aging is like a bad party. People keep leaving.” (Andre Prevost)

Bonus – Universal Truths About Moms (They Know It’s True!):

• “The reason mothers worry so much is because everyone belongs to them except their husbands.” (Rebecca Wells)
• “Mothers are the people who make us laugh, even when we think we can’t smile anymore.” (Unknown)
• “All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.” (Charles M. Schulz)
• “The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.” (Oprah Winfrey)
• “Happiness is a warm hug from Mom.” (Unknown)
• “A mother’s hug is a magic potion that heals everything and makes everything feel better.” (Unknown)
• “There’s nothing like a mother’s love to give you strength and wipe away all your fears.” (Emily Giffin)
• “Home is where Mom is.” (Unknown)
• “You don’t choose your love. It finds you. All you can do is try your best to deserve it.” (Unknown)
• “Mom, thanks for always being there for me, even when I didn’t deserve it.” (Unknown)

Bonus – Quotes You Can Write In a Card (A Heartfelt Touch):

• “To the world you may be just one person, but to one person you may be the world.” (Dr. Seuss)
• “I love you more than words can say, Mom. Thanks for everything.” (Unknown)
• “You’re the strongest woman I know, Mom. Thank you for inspiring me every day.” (Unknown)
• “No matter how old I get, you’ll always be my Mom, and I’ll always be your child.” (Unknown)
• “Happy Mother’s Day, Mom! You’re the best!” (Unknown)

Remember, the best quotes for your Mom will depend on her unique personality and sense of humor. Choose a selection that reflects your relationship and is sure to make her smile (or snort-laugh)!